The Daily Giggle

A collection of funny e-mails

Cowboy story

A cowboy was herding his cattle in a remote pasture
when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust
cloud towards him. The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci
shoes, Ray Ban sunglasses and YSL tie, leans out the window and
asks the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and
calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"
The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie,
then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers,
"Sure, Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell
notebook computer, connects it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a

NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation

System to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another
NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it
to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany . Within
seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been
processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL database through
an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex formulas.
He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after
a few minutes, receives a response. Finally, he prints out a
full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and
finally turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1586
cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my
calves," He watches the young man select one of the animals
and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his
car. Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if
I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me
back my calf?" The young man thinks about it for a second
and then says, "Okay, why not?"
"You're a consultant." says the cowboy.
"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did
you guess that?" "No guessing required." answered the cowboy.
"You showed up here even though nobody called you; you
want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I
never asked; and you don't know anything about my business.. ...Now give
me back my dog."

I promise more will follow